About My Best Friend:

Thursday, 14 February 2008
Posted by Neugier


My hubby, although not perfect, is truly very nearly so. We've been married a little over five years now and while there are so many things I admire and am grateful for when it comes to my hubby/best friend, I believe the one I most admire and appreciate is this: Without exception, I KNOW that my husband will always consider my feelings and thoughts on any and all matters, and will ultimately do what is best.

I am a very strong person with definite opinions and reasons for them (as is my husband) and due to my childhood, trust does not come easily for me. Trusting my husband is a choice I make. He, in turn, has and is teaching me the true meaning of the word trust. Trust is not obedience; It is choosing to communicate even when you don't "feel" like it or may not feel that you even know how. It is choosing to give yourself to your spouse and allowing him to care for and protect you in every way.

Sometimes I have to laugh to myself --even aloud at times. My childhood looked perfect to outsiders, and while there were aspects that were wonderful there were numerous times that I experienced physical or mental abuse. Which is something that God does not condone. There were numerous times when I experienced being told I would never amount to "anything" and my dreams and my talents were ridiculed. Being naturally strong, I did make "something" of myself prior to meeting my husband. However, I "filed" so many of my dreams in the proverbial "for someone else/that's not me/I can't and I'm not interested" files. And wouldn't you know that these are the very dreams in which my husband is naturally the strongest! Oh, and did I mention that my hubby likes to do everything together? He actually wants me to be a part of every aspect of his life! Which, of course, means I have to choose to let go of some life long held positions, dig down deep through all the pain and patterns of self-sabotaging and reclaim, explore, and rediscover the dreams of my childhood. This is not an easy journey but is a freeing and rewarding one.

Thank you My Love for loving me with a perfect love. Thank you for being my best friend. Thank you for truly protecting me in every way! Thank you for helping me to reclaim what is rightfully mine.

I love you!

2 comments:

Neugier said...

Woah Nelly, you are in for it now. Talk about controversy! Don't you know that FAMILY SECRETS are one of the most sacred cows offered on the altar of protecting those who hurt the innocent?....
I am proud of you for having the wherewithall to write this entry. You will probably take a lot of flack for it, but "keeping secrets" is not more important than sharing a past which can either help someone else who has been there to deal with it, or help someone who IS there to get out of it, or help someone to avoid hurting someone else. You have tampered with a Sacred Cow and you will probably pay dearly in many of your relationships.
I have no comment on your parents whom I know you love dearly as do I; your past is for you to share as you see fit, which is why its called YOUR PAST. However having been an associate pastor and dealt with many families, I can tell you that you did the right thing. I can also tell you that organized religion does not take kindly to children or spouses who break the Code of Silence and Spills The Family Secrets/Air The Dirty Laundry etc.
Here is what I've advised many couples: 1. Live your private life like you live your public life, 2. No More Secrets, 3. An Abuser has No Rights.
So if anyone has a problem with this entry, they probably either have secrets of their own or they are keeping someone else's secrets, or they fear embarrasment about some personal issue.
Since you walk your talk, you have nothing to worry about.
The people who read this entry and identify with it? They thank you, even if no one else does!
Love,
Miles

Lauren and Jim said...

This was a beautiful post about the love of your life. Thank you for sharing. I'm so sorry you had to endure so much pain throughout your life, but it sounds like you have been able to turn something bad into something wonderful. I hope you fulfill all of your dreams. It sounds like you are well on your way!

And yes, you are welcome to blog about Compassion Int. as well! Thank you for your sweet comments on my blog. Happy Valentine's Day to you and your family.